Think About It
by Angel's Dust
Summary: Jesse and Maxie are at a crossroads on the brink of dating. Jesse, while trying to protect Maxie, still can't stop his feelings for her. He takes time to think if he should continue to go against his heart or if, for once, he should listen to it.
1. Chapter 1

**disclaimer: i don't own GH or the characters, i just wrote the story.**

**Think About It**

"Just think about it," she'd asked me. And I was. I was still thinking about it a day later as I sat in Kelly's all alone. The night had come and a summer chill had set into the night. It was Wednesday, and the place was near abandoned. "Just think about it…" the words rung in my head like a bell in a tower chiming. I didn't want to think about it.

What I really wanted was to be able to just act.

Like Nike always says, just do it.

I didn't want to think, I just wanted to act… but sadly, luck was not on my side. So I sat at the corner of the bar, all alone, thinking of what she'd said the night before. God, I wish I could just act. Just run to her house right now and scoop her up in my arms. Tell her how I want to be with her. Make sure she understands… but I couldn't. I was putting her at risk. She'd be in danger.

And I could never do that to her.

Never.

I was still contemplating when I noticed a spikey-haired kid walk in. I knew him… he was friends with Maxie, right? Dated her little sister… I knew him alright. What was his name again…?

I tried to think about it, tried to forget those words…

"You okay?" a voice asked.

I looked up to see the kid with the weird hair looking at me curiously. "What?" I asked, stunned for a moment.

"Are you okay? You look…" he seemed to search for words. "You look down."

I shrugged. "Eh," was all that came out.

He shrugged again and ordered a coffee to go. The waitress handed him his change and a cup and he turned to leave. "Wait," I said before I realized it.The kid turned around again to face me; he waited quietly to hear for my reason for stopping him. "Um…" I felt stupid again, awkward. Then I remembered those four words again. "You're dating Maxie's little sister, right?"

The kid took a step forward. God, what was his name? Why didn't I ever remember things when I needed to? "Um, yeah, I am… why?" He seemed slightly confused.

Join the club, kid, I thought.

What the hell, might as well go for it. "Does her dad like you?" I asked stupidly.

The kid started laughing with a grin on his face. After a moment, he regained his posture and took a seat next to me. We both turned back to the bar as he spoke. "Mac hates me," he began. "Well, okay, now I think he just barely tolerates me since Georgie makes him, but if he had his way, I'd never set foot in the same country as her ever again." I nodded.

"So, it's a normal thing? Mac hating guys who like his daughter?"

The kid smiled and chuckled a bit again. "Yeah, it is, sadly. Makes it tough for guys like us, right? The poor souls who fall for a Jones' sister." I nodded again.

So there was no chance, right? Great… just great.

"Look, if I can make it through with Georgie, I'm sure if you try, you could with Maxie… as long as you think it's worth it, anyway."

I nodded, "Oh, it is… but I'm not sure I want to put her through that…"

He took a sip of his coffee and looked me in the eye. "I'll tell you something about Mac, okay. Mac is never going to like_ anyone_ his daughters date. Ever. They're his daughters, and he's way overprotective – I mean, can you really blame him?" I shook my head. Got me there. "So, if it's worth it, you'll be able to find some way to see Maxie if you really want to. I did it and so can you. And, trust me, it's not easy to sneak around behind Mac's back – so you better be careful if decide to."

I smiled slightly. "Thanks for the advice…" I went to say his name when I remembered I didn't know it.

"Dillon," the kid said as he stood up again. "The name's Dillon." He held a hand out. "Nice to finally meet you officially." I took his outstretched hand.

"Jesse," I replied.

"Oh, I know who you are," Dillon smirked. "Maxie's crazy about you, you know, right?" I nodded again.

"I know."

"One last thing, Jesse," Dillon said, looking me square in the eye; I looked right back, "It is worth it in the end. Good luck." He smiled, turned around, and left, leaving me to my lonesome yet again.

I turned back to my thoughts.


	2. Chapter 2

**Think About It **

**Chapter 2**

_disclaimer: the usual, i don't own anything, i just wrote the story._

"I can't see you anymore," I was saying. "It's not safe for you to be around me…" I knew she could see through my lies. My deception never worked on her, not ever. "Maxie, we're over, okay? Get it? Yeah, we had something special when we were _trapped in a cabin!_ But it was a cabin… we thought we were gonna die. Lots of people bond over that… You and me_ now_, we got nothing."

"I don't believe you," she replied. Why couldn't she just back down. Why couldn't she just take the pain she felt and leave me to my lonesome to sulk? I couldn't go back on my word. I couldn't sneak around with her. It wasn't right to hide a relationship, and I wasn't about to change my mind.

"I don't care if you believe me or not. Listen to my words, Maxie. I don't want to be with you… not anymore, anyway. It's over. That's it, and we're done now." Her face scrunched with angry determination as I began to turn away.

I only got one step away before she appeared before me. "We're not over, and you know it." She spoke passionately. "Jesse," she grabbed one of my hands. It took me a moment to remember to shrug it away. I shoved my hands into my pockets to avoid future contact. "Please," her eyes softened as they pleaded with mine. "Please don't do this. Forget whatever Mac is holding over you. Please… just think about this. Think it though, okay? You and I both know that we are meant to be, and the longer you fight it, the worse you'll feel…" She took a moment and averted her eyes. I knew the tears were welding in the corners of her eyes. I longed to hold her tightly in my arms… to tell her it was okay… promise I'd never break her heart again… I longed to simply_ be_ with her.

I pushed back all emotion and put on another brave front – I was running low on energy.

Maxie looked up at me again. I showed nothing. "Please, Jesse, we can sneak around if need be…" She heaved a small sigh. "Just think about it," she asked me. I could still smell the scent of her perfume in the wind. The piers were abandoned and lonely at this hour of the night. The drizzle of rain kept many in, but not me. I relived that very moment in my head over and over again and yet again.

I thought about Dillon's advice. Was it worth risking everything for a relationship that might just lead to nothing but what all the others did: pain. I knew that I didn't have the best track record, but with Maxie, it seemed like it could be different. I chuckled to myself lightly at the thought of Maxie learning of my dating past… she'd probably run as far away as possible.

I felt the rain pick up as I leaned back onto the bench. Out of the corner of my eye I saw figure move in the darkness. As it walked toward me, I made out the shape of a girl. "Jesse?" questioned a voice I'd recognize anywhere. I looked up and over to it.

"Yeah?" I didn't want to have this discussion now. Not here, either. This was the scene of our last crime and I didn't want to have another moment here again. Maxie walked over to me and stood, looking down on me. I was barely able to see her, the streetlights not yet on and the moon covered by dark clouds.

"What are you doing out here in the rain?" she asked me. Why did it matter?

"I'm busy, Maxie," I started to tell her and stood up to leave. I can't stay here, I told myself… I might do something I'll regret. I made sure there was a decent distance between us and waited for her response.

"You don't look too busy. Why are you out here? It's raining."

"Why are you out here? Unless you're delivering a message from Mac, I don't want to talk to you," I responded. Why do I have to be such an ass. I gauged her response – my comment barely registered with her, good. "I have to go," I excused myself.

"Wait!" She grabbed my wrist and held on tightly. "Jesse…" A few feet down a streetlight buzzed on and off. I turned to get my arm back, but somehow caught her eye instead.

I forgot what I was doing and stood there. Wow, her eyes were the most beautiful I'd ever seen… deep as oceans. "Please stay," was all she whispered. I barely heard the words come out of her mouth.

And I knew I would.

I didn't really have much free will at the moment… it was those eyes, I swear. "I can't… I have to go…" I tried to tell her.

I broke eye contact and regained most of my posture.

Don't lead her on, I told myself, you can't go there with her so don't hurt her even more in the process…

"Jesse," she whispered my name again. It floated off her tongue and into the wind. "We can do this."

I'm not so sure we can, girl.

Fighting the temptation to kiss her was hard enough. I had to break contact, so I yanked my arm away. She took a step forward and stared me down. "Jesse," she told me, this time her voice was firm, hard, commanding.

This voice was new to me.

"If you want to leave now, go." She arched an eyebrow. "But if you want to stay, you should." I could feel that my shirt was completely soaked through by now. Her skin glistened of rain drops.

The idea of her was intoxicating me.

"I should go," I said to no one. I was caught once again in her eyes. "before I do something stupid."

I saw her move a step closer. "Stupid? What stupid thing would you ever do?"

This was just getting cruel an inhumane now.

She was doing things to me.

She took another step. I felt the rain pounding on my back and shoulders now. I noticed that Maxie was soaked as well.

With the rain falling all around, she closed the gap between us. I'd forgotten just how sweet her lip's had tasted. And before I knew it, I lost all sense of self. All there was left was her and me and the kiss we were sharing. The rain pounded on us and faded away with the rest of the world for that minute.

Finally I realized who I was and what I was doing and I pushed away. "I can't do this, Maxie, I'm sorry. It's just not going to work."

I turned and took off before she could respond.


	3. Chapter 3

**Think About It**

**Chapter 3**

_(yes, this is the last chapter, and no there probably won't be a sequel.)_

_disclaimer: the usual, i don't own anything - i just wrote the story._

I barely slept that night. Maxie's words ran through my head. Her touch haunted my memory. That kiss never left me alone. The rhythmic pounding of rain on my window – which usually soothed – only served to remind me more of Maxie.

So, after a night of tormented sleep, I finally got up and headed out. I wasn't sure where I wanted to go, I just wanted to get out, really. I ended up at the park, just strolling though with nowhere to go. As the gazebo came into my sight, I heard a distinct voice. And then another.

I slowed my pace and began to eavesdrop. "I just don't understand why he's being so difficult, Georgie. I mean, we could work around this. You and Dillon were able to sneak around, why can't he just give in and do that same?"

"Maxie, it's not that simple. First, Dillon and I are both teenagers, okay? We both go to high school. Jesse is an undercover _cop_, Maxie. He has a job – a career. And he works for Mac – that's not so easy to get around either. Besides Dillon always seemed to want me, I was just too stupid to notice it, remember?"

"You were just distracted… I just wish he'd stop fighting it, you know? I mean, we had a connection. A real connection… and I just wish he'd admit it." I wish I could admit it too, I thought to myself.

"I don't think he's worth your time, Maxie." I scrunched my face. I might be a lot of things, but I'm not a waste of her time!

"What do you mean? Of course he's worth my time…" At least she gets it.

"Oh, come on! For the past week or two all he's done is push and push and push. And all you've done is pleaded and pleaded with him. He's like a crater, Maxie, he's not gonna budge."

I watched as Maxie sighed and placed a hand to her head. "Georgie," she began slowly, "If you only believe one thing I'll ever tell you, believe this: he's worth it." I felt a smile crawling it's way onto my lips. I inched forward. "You know how you feel about Dillon – how you want to marry him one day because he's the one – how you just _know_ that he's the one…" I noted Georgie nodding with a small blush creeping into her cheeks. "That's how it is with Jesse." Is it really? How come she knows all this – how _could_ she know all this?

Is that why I can't seem to stop thinking about her every waking – and sleeping moment?

This is not fair. If we're meant to be, I guess I shouldn't put up such a fight to stay apart, should I? But then what if we're not? What if she's actually wrong and in a month we're broken up and hate each other? That would not be good. I'd hate to lose her like that forever.

My thoughts preoccupied me from their conversation until I heard Georgie say, "Wow, I'm late… I have a lunch date with the one. I'll see you later!" I ducked back behind a bush as she rushed past where I hiding.

I waited for a minute, making sure that she was gone before I came out from hiding.

"Jesse? Why are you hiding behind bushes? I know you're an undercover cop, but I didn't think you'd take it so literally…"

I flashed her a fake smile. "It's a new part of the job. Your dad told me to go practice my techniques and master them… I think he just wanted me to go away, quite frankly… No clue why, though."

"Gee, I wonder. Guess he didn't pay attention when I said I was going to the park with Georgie. Oh well." Her eyes shined and looked a little puffy… had she cried?

"Are you okay?" I wondered aloud.

Maxie put up a brave front. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine." She smiled fakely and returned with a question of her own, "Why do you ask?"

I didn't want to go there. I didn't want to think that I was the reason she'd cried – because I knew it was all my fault. I didn't want to feel like holding her in my arms again. Kissing her… and everything else.

"You just… uh…" I searched for the proper words, "you look sad." Way to be an idiot, I applauded myself inside. Could I be anymore stupid? Gee, break her heart and then mention that she looks sad… Way for me to state the obvious.

Why did she like me anyway?

We stood in a silence, staring into each other's eyes, neither of us knowing what to say.

After what seemed like forever, Maxie took a step closer to me. "Did you think about what I said?" she asked me.

I nodded. I couldn't breathe, I felt my heartbeat increase. Another step toward me.

"Did you make a decision yet?" she took another step.

This was cruel and she knew it. How was I supposed to say no to her now that she was inches away from me. I knew what my answer should be. And I knew what I should've said.

I nodded again.

I knew what to say, and I knew what I wanted to say. But should I actually say it?

She moved closer again. I could feel her against me now. Her breathing was regular… could she tell mine was erratic? Could she feel my heart beating a million miles a minute?

"So, what did you decide?" All I could think of was how much I wanted to kiss her… and how I should be strong.

Don't let her get to you, I told myself.

I took a step backward. "Maxie," I started. My voice was firm, unlike the rest of me.

Just tell her to get lost, I told myself, you two can't get mixed up in each other.

She just waited patiently, as if she knew I was debating myself.

"Okay." I said before I knew what'd I done. We stood there for a moment, just looking at each other. Why did I just say okay? I yelled at myself silently.

Take it back now, I yelled, don't let her get involved with you more than she already is!

"Okay?" she threw back at me, as if she read my mind.

I stopped and looked at her closely.

"Okay," I said after a moment. I'd give in to her finally – God knows she'd been waiting for this moment since forever.

This time, I was the one who cut through the air between us. As soon as my second okay came out, I pushed through the space between us and onto her. I'd been waiting so long for this moment, and maybe she was right.

Maybe we were the one for each other… maybe we'd only last a year or two… either way, I wanted to find out already.


End file.
